Why Are You Still Calling Me?

Years had past. We forgave. We forget. Things have changed. Everything’s different now.

My life was like an journey when I realized that we could never be together. Who’s fault? Not mine, and hopefully it was not yours. I guess you were just lost. Longing for something that you cannot even have. Looking for something that you cannot even find. Probably you were just lost. Lost somewhere that realizing nobody’s there for you. Or that you think, that your special someone will always be there for you. But the years proved them wrong. Though you think that everything will be okay because you think that in time, everything will be alright. You think that in the long end, you will be in a happy place with the happy people around you, have a perfect, normal, happy life. Like what I’ve said. Time proved everything wrong. Everything will change. For a reason? Maybe not. Because people make this reasons, for just something to happen.

I appreciate that you still think of me. Telling me on how you miss me– on how I sound when I’m laughing, or even making you laugh. I appreciate that you still know my weaknesses in some way. Making me feel that I’m truly missed. 

Still I bet, you do not have and idea on how I cried at nights, when I was longing for you. When I was sending signals that I needed you to be there by my side. You had no idea what would make me happy. Because you were never there.

Nonetheless, I do not have to say it, shout it, or let the whole world know that I hated you. Quickly you realized that you were forgiven. Probably that’s why you are still calling. I know why you are still doing this. I know that you need someone who will actually listen to your rants, heartaches, everything that we could talk about under the sun. And in the long run, you would probably realize that I am the one who will always be there, to listen.

I have moved on now. It’s almost like three years of a journey of not thinking about you. I have my life back. Someone is actually now waiting for me to get home, and asking me if I had my dinner, and talk to me about everything. Someone who I could share my pint of cookie’s and cream while watching dvd. Someone who could get mad if forget to take my vitamins. Someone who could even go with me to the mall, stroll there for the whole day just for looking for one item that I’ve been ranting. Someone who could actually cry with me. And someone who would make me feel that he needs me for a lifetime. 

I’m praying for you. Praying that you could find the perfect way to happiness. Wishing you all the best that life has to offer. If you do need someone who could listen, you know that I am still here. I will always be here to pick up the phone in the middle of the night and we could talk about everything. But I may not be always there for you– because I have my life back. Hopefully you could have yours.

Take care. Take lots of care. And I wish you the best.